Last Saturday, Linda and I, along with Erica and Brock, made the short trip to Starved Rock on the Illinois River. Besides a lot of Indian legends and French explorer/trader stories, the place is known for its habitat of Bald Eagles. They nest in the high trees atop rocky cliffs along the river. There is something inspirational about seeing eagles in the wild. Seeing them on top of their nests is an extra thrill.
But while I’ve seen eagles’ nests in the wild from below, I’ve never seen one from above, except for those that had been preserved and relocated to a display case, as in the visitor center at the state park. From below, the nest looks gnarly and prickly, with jagged chunks of sharp sticks and rocks poking through. It makes you wonder now comfortable it possibly could be. But that’s from below. From above, looking inside the nest, it looks altogether different. The mother eagle lines the inside with feathers and soft fur from animals it had preyed upon, so when the young eaglets hatch, they have a comfortable warm bed to snuggle into, sleep, eat and grow.
But as the young eagles begin to mature, the mother starts to “stir the nest.” With her talons and beak, she pulls at the fur and feathers, letting some of the sticks poke through. As the weeks go by, she does this more and more, making the nest uncomfortable for the eaglets, so that along with her increased prodding, when the time is right, they get uncomfortable enough that they eventually leave the nest to a new freedom that they could otherwise have never experienced.
I heard someone say almost ten years ago, “Comfort is the enemy of growth,” and I adopted it as a saying of mine to help others in difficult situations. I, as you, like to be comfortable. Sometimes it takes God’s poking and prodding, stirring the nest in my surroundings, to get me to move out from what I’m familiar with in order to experience greater things he has for me. When we get too comfortable, we get complaisant. God wants all of us to be in a continual state of growth, and that means having to go through regular and often difficult stages of change in our environment. It feels uncaring early on, but in the long run, it’s God’s love for us that pokes and prods and causes the discomfort that makes us move out of our comfort zone and into new ways to be all that he created us to be.
So if you are getting comfortable, enjoy it for a while, but just know that because God loves you, he’s going to bring about some changes in your life so that you can experience it to it’s fullest: to be all you can be and serve in other ways you otherwise never would be able to. As you feel the stirring of the nest, know that God has new heights he wants you to soar. It’ll take some risk on your part and along the way you’ll have to make some leaps of faith to get those wings doing what they’re supposed to do, but it sure beats spending your whole life stuck in a stick bowl on top of a cold rocky cliff.
Friday, July 27, 2012
Friday, July 20, 2012
A Playground or Battlefield?
Lots of disturbing things on the news this week. It’s hard to read the paper, follow online headlines, or watch the evening news. At least this week it was.
There is the whole middle east thing going on, now in several countries. More and more, groups that hate Christianity and want to exterminate Jews are gaining power in their respective countries. There was the suicide bomber in Bulgaria who blew up a bus full of Jewish teenagers. Many of us have been praying for the two little girls who have been apparently abducted in Iowa...no news so far is bad news, and our hearts are aching. In raids across the country over the weekend, seventy-nine children, mostly abducted and/or runaway American kids from troubled homes, were set free from their sex-slave captors (an international network not unlike what was portrayed in the movie, “Taken”). Then, of course, the shooting spree in the Denver area theatre by a med school student (recent drop-out), has kept many glued to cable news programming. And this is only the beginning. There is a litany of really bad news items around the world and in the states this week that remind us of the fallen nature of the human race.
But that’s not all that is happening.
No doubt, the depraved nature of sinful people is creating havoc. Remember the words of Pogo, “We have met the enemy and he is us.” But there is more going on in this world than just the sinful actions of fallen people. There is a more sinister activity working in the unseen world that is the root cause of all evil. Ephesians 6:12 says, “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.” Anyone who denies the reality of evil is oblivious to the real world. Evil forces exist and are actively engaging with unwary, though willing, sinful people to do Satan’s work. This evil spiritual presence is real. It’s malevolent. It’s insidious. We need to be on guard.
The Christian life is not a playground, it’s a battlefield.
That’s why Paul continued his treatise in Ephesians 6 with instructions for followers of Jesus to be armed and protected to defeat this evil spiritual activity. Because this is war and Satan must be defeated. And he will be. Jesus promised us that very thing. But we need to be on guard, protected, armed and poised for spiritual battle as soldiers in God’s army.
This fall, I will be launching an eight week study on Spiritual Warfare from Ephesians 6:10-18. I’d appreciate your prayers for my preparation and for God to do a mighty work in us to advance His Kingdom and overwhelm the gates of hell.
That’s what I’m doing these four weeks while not speaking at The Bridge. I’m preparing and praying. And I really need your prayers for this one.
There is the whole middle east thing going on, now in several countries. More and more, groups that hate Christianity and want to exterminate Jews are gaining power in their respective countries. There was the suicide bomber in Bulgaria who blew up a bus full of Jewish teenagers. Many of us have been praying for the two little girls who have been apparently abducted in Iowa...no news so far is bad news, and our hearts are aching. In raids across the country over the weekend, seventy-nine children, mostly abducted and/or runaway American kids from troubled homes, were set free from their sex-slave captors (an international network not unlike what was portrayed in the movie, “Taken”). Then, of course, the shooting spree in the Denver area theatre by a med school student (recent drop-out), has kept many glued to cable news programming. And this is only the beginning. There is a litany of really bad news items around the world and in the states this week that remind us of the fallen nature of the human race.
But that’s not all that is happening.
No doubt, the depraved nature of sinful people is creating havoc. Remember the words of Pogo, “We have met the enemy and he is us.” But there is more going on in this world than just the sinful actions of fallen people. There is a more sinister activity working in the unseen world that is the root cause of all evil. Ephesians 6:12 says, “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.” Anyone who denies the reality of evil is oblivious to the real world. Evil forces exist and are actively engaging with unwary, though willing, sinful people to do Satan’s work. This evil spiritual presence is real. It’s malevolent. It’s insidious. We need to be on guard.
The Christian life is not a playground, it’s a battlefield.
That’s why Paul continued his treatise in Ephesians 6 with instructions for followers of Jesus to be armed and protected to defeat this evil spiritual activity. Because this is war and Satan must be defeated. And he will be. Jesus promised us that very thing. But we need to be on guard, protected, armed and poised for spiritual battle as soldiers in God’s army.
This fall, I will be launching an eight week study on Spiritual Warfare from Ephesians 6:10-18. I’d appreciate your prayers for my preparation and for God to do a mighty work in us to advance His Kingdom and overwhelm the gates of hell.
That’s what I’m doing these four weeks while not speaking at The Bridge. I’m preparing and praying. And I really need your prayers for this one.
Friday, July 13, 2012
Don't Confuse Me with the Facts
Mark Twain said, “All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure."
What? When does knowledge get in the way of success?
Well, obviously, Twain as a satirist, wasn’t speaking of real and/or complete knowledge on any given subject. He was talking about having confidence and not knowing the things that might keep you from launching out into an endeavor, as well as thinking that you know so much that you are unable to learn what you will need to be successful in that venture.
Knowledge gets in the way of growth, learning and success when we think we know it all and approach issues, discussions, and decision-making with our minds made up. That’s being opinionated...your opinions are strong and never in doubt. But being opinionated is a form of arrogance and it keeps a lot of people from accomplishing a lot of things. It also gets in the way of positive influence on others. We actually tend to write off the views of opinionated people.
Being opinionated is a family trait of mine. Not my immediate family: my wife isn’t that way, nor are my kids. But I grew up that way. In college, friends would joke, “Ziegler has no trouble entering into a subject of which he hasn’t studied and still sound like an expert.” Hahaha! Well, actually, it’s not that funny. When I get with extended family, it really annoys me to hear relatives talk like they know so much about things that they are guessing about. It wasn’t a good trait of mine when I was younger, and I have to keep battling it today.
The Book of Proverbs has helped me a lot. Solomon continually compares the wise man with the foolish man. The essential difference between the two is that the wise man realizes how little he really knows and so is always learning. The foolish man thinks he knows it all so his mind is made up and you can’t teach him anything. When I came to understand that, I thought, “I want to keep learning. I’d better come to terms with how little I really know.” Today, at 51, I try to say things like, “I believe…,” or, “I think…,” or, “It seems…” or, “I might be wrong about this, but…”
I still have my mind made up about a lot of things, but I learned a long time ago that with many of those things, I wind up being wrong. So the best approach is to realizes that while I have an opinion, it may not be accurate. I may have been misled, I might be jumping to conclusions, I might not have all the facts right, and I’ve always got a lot more to learn.
Are you able to keep learning and growing because you have the humility to admit that you don’t already know it all? Or is your mind all made up, unwilling to be confused with additional facts, or rattled by considering an opposing view?
What? When does knowledge get in the way of success?
Well, obviously, Twain as a satirist, wasn’t speaking of real and/or complete knowledge on any given subject. He was talking about having confidence and not knowing the things that might keep you from launching out into an endeavor, as well as thinking that you know so much that you are unable to learn what you will need to be successful in that venture.
Knowledge gets in the way of growth, learning and success when we think we know it all and approach issues, discussions, and decision-making with our minds made up. That’s being opinionated...your opinions are strong and never in doubt. But being opinionated is a form of arrogance and it keeps a lot of people from accomplishing a lot of things. It also gets in the way of positive influence on others. We actually tend to write off the views of opinionated people.
Being opinionated is a family trait of mine. Not my immediate family: my wife isn’t that way, nor are my kids. But I grew up that way. In college, friends would joke, “Ziegler has no trouble entering into a subject of which he hasn’t studied and still sound like an expert.” Hahaha! Well, actually, it’s not that funny. When I get with extended family, it really annoys me to hear relatives talk like they know so much about things that they are guessing about. It wasn’t a good trait of mine when I was younger, and I have to keep battling it today.
The Book of Proverbs has helped me a lot. Solomon continually compares the wise man with the foolish man. The essential difference between the two is that the wise man realizes how little he really knows and so is always learning. The foolish man thinks he knows it all so his mind is made up and you can’t teach him anything. When I came to understand that, I thought, “I want to keep learning. I’d better come to terms with how little I really know.” Today, at 51, I try to say things like, “I believe…,” or, “I think…,” or, “It seems…” or, “I might be wrong about this, but…”
I still have my mind made up about a lot of things, but I learned a long time ago that with many of those things, I wind up being wrong. So the best approach is to realizes that while I have an opinion, it may not be accurate. I may have been misled, I might be jumping to conclusions, I might not have all the facts right, and I’ve always got a lot more to learn.
Are you able to keep learning and growing because you have the humility to admit that you don’t already know it all? Or is your mind all made up, unwilling to be confused with additional facts, or rattled by considering an opposing view?
Thursday, July 5, 2012
When Do You Start Telling Your Kids about Sex?
In our Life Apps series at The Bridge this summer, we are
taking
questions via texting and answering them with a panel. Because we could
not get to all of the questions this last week, I am blogging
to respond to some of the submitted questions that were not addressed
in the service. Last week's message was, "Good Sex, Bad Sex," and it
helped with a Biblical understanding on the subject. You can watch the
sermon and panel here. Below is one more question we weren't able to get to on the panel. It's especially good for parents with younger children.
What is a good age/maturity level when kids can be introduced to sexual subjects?
In reality, all of us introduce sexual subjects to our children very early on. We begin talking about how there are boys and girls––”mommy is a girl and daddy is a boy”. Most parents even identify boy and girl parts when kids are very little. We do it intuitively without being embarrassed, because the kids are so young. But boy/girl identity is sexual in nature. We think of sex as intercourse, but it is so much more. It encompasses all gender differences and the way we interact with one another between the sexes. We talk with our kids about when Mommy and Daddy fell in love and got married. We talk with them when they have crushes or someone has a crush on them. So the question is not so much when do we introduce these subjects, but how much do we tell them and at what age.
I think that kids learn best at an appropriate level when they are inquisitive (inquisitive minds learn). As they ask questions, it is best for us to answer frankly and to the extent that they can process the answer. The more straightforward we are, as parents, without being obviously embarrassed by the question (or sometimes coming across as though the child should be ashamed for asking), the more likely the child will be willing to discuss these things as they get older, and the more likely they will have a healthy view of sex. At what age you give them information depends on the questions they are asking and their level of understanding. As a parent, you have that insight with your child more than any expert.
When a very young child asks, “Where do babies come from?” A good answer may be, “God has a special way of Daddy’s and Mommy’s love mixing together to put a baby in Mommy.” As they get older, they will want to learn more. But if you gradually give them more information based on the questions they are asking, they are not shocked and are able to process what they are being told in the context of values. That’s why YOU want to be the one talking to them, and not merely leaving it up to the school.
In the old days, almost every family had farm animals, or at the least, a horse or two (even in town). The kids figured it out because it was part of what they saw every day with the animals they were taking care of. My friends who grew up on farms knew way more than me at a much earlier age. And it wasn't dirty to them. We don’t have that here in suburban Chicago. But kids do ask questions and we know the answers. We just have to answer them honestly and with God’s perspective, to help shape their morality and lead them to healthy relationships in the future.
What is a good age/maturity level when kids can be introduced to sexual subjects?
In reality, all of us introduce sexual subjects to our children very early on. We begin talking about how there are boys and girls––”mommy is a girl and daddy is a boy”. Most parents even identify boy and girl parts when kids are very little. We do it intuitively without being embarrassed, because the kids are so young. But boy/girl identity is sexual in nature. We think of sex as intercourse, but it is so much more. It encompasses all gender differences and the way we interact with one another between the sexes. We talk with our kids about when Mommy and Daddy fell in love and got married. We talk with them when they have crushes or someone has a crush on them. So the question is not so much when do we introduce these subjects, but how much do we tell them and at what age.
I think that kids learn best at an appropriate level when they are inquisitive (inquisitive minds learn). As they ask questions, it is best for us to answer frankly and to the extent that they can process the answer. The more straightforward we are, as parents, without being obviously embarrassed by the question (or sometimes coming across as though the child should be ashamed for asking), the more likely the child will be willing to discuss these things as they get older, and the more likely they will have a healthy view of sex. At what age you give them information depends on the questions they are asking and their level of understanding. As a parent, you have that insight with your child more than any expert.
When a very young child asks, “Where do babies come from?” A good answer may be, “God has a special way of Daddy’s and Mommy’s love mixing together to put a baby in Mommy.” As they get older, they will want to learn more. But if you gradually give them more information based on the questions they are asking, they are not shocked and are able to process what they are being told in the context of values. That’s why YOU want to be the one talking to them, and not merely leaving it up to the school.
In the old days, almost every family had farm animals, or at the least, a horse or two (even in town). The kids figured it out because it was part of what they saw every day with the animals they were taking care of. My friends who grew up on farms knew way more than me at a much earlier age. And it wasn't dirty to them. We don’t have that here in suburban Chicago. But kids do ask questions and we know the answers. We just have to answer them honestly and with God’s perspective, to help shape their morality and lead them to healthy relationships in the future.
Questions on Sex
In our Life Apps series at The Bridge this summer, we are taking
questions via texting and answering them with a panel. Because we could
not get to all of the questions this last week, I am blogging
to respond to some of the submitted questions that were not addressed
in the service. Last week's message was, "Good Sex, Bad Sex" and it helped gain a Biblical understanding on the subject. You can watch the sermon and panel here.
What does the marriage bed being undefiled mean?
The term comes from Hebrews 13:4 – “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous” (ESV).
In the 1st century world, two schools of thought existed. One promoted hedonism, leaving very few restraints on sexuality (far more popular). The other promoted asceticism, viewing sex as a necessary evil for procreation (this thinking made its way into Catholicism).
The Biblical view is neither and the author of Hebrews was arguing against both. The Greek word for “undefiled” refers to something that is pure and good being corrupted or ruined by impurities (i.e. bacteria defiling food, etc.). So the implication is that the marriage bed, sexual activity between a husband and wife, is pure and good. But as he clarifies in the next sentence, sexual activity outside of marriage defiles it.
This came up in our panel last week when someone asked, “Is there anything between two married people that is out of bounds?” I responded that the Bible does not say that anything is wrong but that Hebrews 13 says that the marriage bed is “undefiled”. However, sexual activity is not to be selfish in nature and anything that goes on between a husband and wife must be comfortable and enjoyable for both.
What about masturbation? In and out of marriage?
This can be a pretty controversial subject and there are some strong opinions on it. I’d like to stay with what the Bible says on these matters, and on this one, the Bible just does not say. Some want to point to the Old Testament story of Onan, but that story was not about masterbation. It was about a man who used the Leverite Law to have sex but not to fulfill the principle by “spilling his seed on the ground.” So it doesn’t really apply.
But there can be principles in the Bible that sometimes do apply. For example, Jesus said that looking at a woman lustfully is committing adultery in the heart. In every counseling situation I’ve been in where this has been a problem, it has been used in conjunction with lust...lusting with pornography or sexual imaginations/fantasies of someone other than the spouse. Those are things the Bible does talk about and those are the areas we should want to be disciplined in and surrender to God.
How can unmarried people and those not in a relationship apply these principles?
Whether or not you are married or in a relationship, we all need to have a Biblical understanding of life and the world we live in. And not that many people never face any sexual temptation. So in that sense, it is important for you to understand and embrace God’s perceptive on sex, every bit as much as married people. And it is also important for you to be committed to honoring God in this area.
The other part of this is that as Christians, we are part of a body. We affect others and should care about what other people struggle with and we should be interested in how we can help each other. If we remain ambivalent about matters that do not touch us personally, how can it be said that we really care about each another? So in some ways, we also apply these principles by helping others face challenges in a Biblical way, even if they are challenges that we will not face ourselves.
What does the marriage bed being undefiled mean?
The term comes from Hebrews 13:4 – “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous” (ESV).
In the 1st century world, two schools of thought existed. One promoted hedonism, leaving very few restraints on sexuality (far more popular). The other promoted asceticism, viewing sex as a necessary evil for procreation (this thinking made its way into Catholicism).
The Biblical view is neither and the author of Hebrews was arguing against both. The Greek word for “undefiled” refers to something that is pure and good being corrupted or ruined by impurities (i.e. bacteria defiling food, etc.). So the implication is that the marriage bed, sexual activity between a husband and wife, is pure and good. But as he clarifies in the next sentence, sexual activity outside of marriage defiles it.
This came up in our panel last week when someone asked, “Is there anything between two married people that is out of bounds?” I responded that the Bible does not say that anything is wrong but that Hebrews 13 says that the marriage bed is “undefiled”. However, sexual activity is not to be selfish in nature and anything that goes on between a husband and wife must be comfortable and enjoyable for both.
What about masturbation? In and out of marriage?
This can be a pretty controversial subject and there are some strong opinions on it. I’d like to stay with what the Bible says on these matters, and on this one, the Bible just does not say. Some want to point to the Old Testament story of Onan, but that story was not about masterbation. It was about a man who used the Leverite Law to have sex but not to fulfill the principle by “spilling his seed on the ground.” So it doesn’t really apply.
But there can be principles in the Bible that sometimes do apply. For example, Jesus said that looking at a woman lustfully is committing adultery in the heart. In every counseling situation I’ve been in where this has been a problem, it has been used in conjunction with lust...lusting with pornography or sexual imaginations/fantasies of someone other than the spouse. Those are things the Bible does talk about and those are the areas we should want to be disciplined in and surrender to God.
How can unmarried people and those not in a relationship apply these principles?
Whether or not you are married or in a relationship, we all need to have a Biblical understanding of life and the world we live in. And not that many people never face any sexual temptation. So in that sense, it is important for you to understand and embrace God’s perceptive on sex, every bit as much as married people. And it is also important for you to be committed to honoring God in this area.
The other part of this is that as Christians, we are part of a body. We affect others and should care about what other people struggle with and we should be interested in how we can help each other. If we remain ambivalent about matters that do not touch us personally, how can it be said that we really care about each another? So in some ways, we also apply these principles by helping others face challenges in a Biblical way, even if they are challenges that we will not face ourselves.
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