Penelope Stokes in Words In Season wrote, “The trouble with turning over a new leaf is that once you’ve done it twice, you’re right back where you started.”
I recently read that more bad habits are broken in the month of January than during any other month. And yet that same article pointed out that only a small percentage of New Year’s resolutions are realized long-term.
I’d like to encourage you. Change in your life is not only possible, it is necessary. When Christians stop growing, they stagnate. You know those grumpy, never-do-anything pessimistic Christians? Somewhere along the line, they stopped growing. People stop growing when they refuse to change.
This happens for a number of reasons. Sometimes it happens because of self-righteousness – “I’m good enough!” Sometimes it happens because of apathy – “What does it matter if I get victory over this?” Sometimes it happens because of defeatism – “I’ll never be able to change.”
We have a little saying at The Bridge: “No one is expected to be perfect, but everyone is expected to be growing.” And that growth demands positive change – gradual, yes, but continual progressive change. The Bible refers to this constant pattern of growth as “sanctification.” And all of us need to be involved in the process.
So what do you need to change? (If you have trouble answering, just ask your spouse!) For some of us this may mean replacing an old bad habit with something good. For others it may mean readjusting a pessimistic attitude, or refocusing on a relationship. Perhaps it has something to do with our spending habits or time management. For all of us, I trust it means a renewed commitment to God – our daily personal time with Him and the weekly service we give to Him.
Don Shelby proclaimed in his sermon, Never Say ‘Never,’ “When we tell ourselves ‘I can never change,’ or ‘That will never happen,’ we presume too much and believe too little. In Jesus Christ, God renders all of our final conclusions premature and all of our talk of determinism as simply bad faith. In Christ, God opens closed doors, brings resurrection, reveals possibilities, reclaims the lost, liberates the cursed and possessed, and changes the unchangeable.”
You can change! Isn’t it about time?
“And as the Spirit of the Lord works within us, we become more and more like Him and reflect His glory even more.” – 2 Cor. 3:18
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Who Cares if the Boys Will Be Home?
Being part of a family where everyone involved themselves in each other’s projects, Katherine excitedly hurried to the editor of the local newspaper and showed him the message. He glanced at it and said, “How nice. The boys will be home for Christmas.” He totally missed the big news of the century––MAN HAD FLOWN!
We are in danger of doing that this week. The story of Joseph and Mary, their love for one another, and Joseph’s kindness to Mary and trust in God after the angel’s appearance, is all very beautiful. The birth in a stable and infant bedding in a feeding trough are fascinating details. Angels appearing to shepherds to announce the baby’s birth, and even the wise men coming from the east to seek out this important child, are wonderful additions to a beautiful story. But all of those components are a bit like Orville and Wilbur making it home for Christmas. Nice pieces of what is being communicated. But the big story should totally eclipse everything else being said! The big news in Luke 2––GOD BECAME A MAN!
That is big news! Bigger than the Santa Claus fable! Even bigger than the real story of Saint Nicholas. Bigger than the holiday lights in downtown Chicago. Bigger than the crowd of shoppers at Woodfield Mall, or anything else you can think of that gets our attention this time of year. Don’t miss the big deal for the incidentals! God came to the earth to identify with you, to absorb your sin, to die for you, to forgive you, to give you a new life! God became a man on your behalf! That’s the big news of every Christmas.
What difference does that make to you?
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Family First?
If you know me, you know I love the family, and you know my family knows that I love them. But is the family supposed to first? What about second?
You often hear of a hierarchy of priorities where people list what is supposed to be most important and it often goes something like: 1) God, 2) Marriage, 3) Children, 4) Church or Friends or Work (this is where the order gets switched around depending on who is speaking).
As with a lot of things, people hear this and shake their heads in agreement because it sounds good, but don’t give a lot of thought to its truthfulness or whether or not it is Biblical. Actually, there is nothing in the Bible that says anything like this, only that we are to love God first and love others second. By having a list like this, anything in the upper levels could or would supersede the lower and if a husband demands of his wife that children be neglected, a wife would or should comply because he is before them. I know a man who lost his job because his wife kept begging him to stay home saying, "Aren't I more important than your job?" He kept saying "yes" and stayed home one too many times and got fired. I think God wanted him instead to fulfill responsibilities both as a husband and employee, and doing so would have been more loving in the end to both his wife and his employer.
Instead, of the above man-made priority list, we should go with the Biblical formula: 1) God first, 2) others second, and understand that we have responsibility in every area God has entrusted us with, not neglecting one God-given responsibility for another. No one area should get in the way of our responsibilities in the other, if those responsibilities have been given to us by God. Duties never conflict. Church should not come before family, but family should also not come before church.
In the common man-made formula, family is always placed before church. But bear in mind, nowhere in the Bible is family described as “precious to God” as the church is. In fact, family relationships on earth, which are temporary, are only a picture of God’s greater reality, his relationship with us and ours with one another in Christ, which will last eternally. My relationship with my kids, as dear to me as they are, will only last a short time unless we are united together in the Body of Christ! I think I can say Biblically that the family is not placed before the church in the Bible. Therefore, I think we have to be careful not to do so as well. Obviously, we have greater responsibility for children when they are little, but that should not be an excuse to neglect church or work altogether. That's why I refer to the “Family First” movement as "worshipping the family" because those in it elevate the family higher than God does, making it an end in and of itself, instead of an instrument to bring us to the greater ends: loving God and loving other people. Grasping this will cause us to involve our families in ways to honor God and serve others and thereby, get us out into the world and to the church, not completely shielding them from the world and guarding them from too much time at church (though there needs to be an element of both protection and time management).
When my kids were little, we all did ministry together, and we still do often. I never felt that church got in the way of our family, and I don't think they felt that way either, though we spent far more time at church and serving, etc., than anyone I know. But it was never in the way of our family. I also don't know of any other family closer than ours, or young adult kids who love the church more than my kids do.
On the other hand, I knew many families who's kids are adults today, who's parents turned down ministry and were very guarded about church involvement because they would say, "Family First." Most of those kids are not even going to church today. Instead of "Family First," the Bible teaches that we should lead our families to put God first and others second. That will give us the most valuable family time we could have.
So the family was given us to help us in loving God and loving others. The family does not exist as an end in and of itself, but the greater end of honoring God and serving others. When we see the family that way, it gives it purpose, and it keeps God in first place and the rest of life in balance.
You often hear of a hierarchy of priorities where people list what is supposed to be most important and it often goes something like: 1) God, 2) Marriage, 3) Children, 4) Church or Friends or Work (this is where the order gets switched around depending on who is speaking).
As with a lot of things, people hear this and shake their heads in agreement because it sounds good, but don’t give a lot of thought to its truthfulness or whether or not it is Biblical. Actually, there is nothing in the Bible that says anything like this, only that we are to love God first and love others second. By having a list like this, anything in the upper levels could or would supersede the lower and if a husband demands of his wife that children be neglected, a wife would or should comply because he is before them. I know a man who lost his job because his wife kept begging him to stay home saying, "Aren't I more important than your job?" He kept saying "yes" and stayed home one too many times and got fired. I think God wanted him instead to fulfill responsibilities both as a husband and employee, and doing so would have been more loving in the end to both his wife and his employer.
Instead, of the above man-made priority list, we should go with the Biblical formula: 1) God first, 2) others second, and understand that we have responsibility in every area God has entrusted us with, not neglecting one God-given responsibility for another. No one area should get in the way of our responsibilities in the other, if those responsibilities have been given to us by God. Duties never conflict. Church should not come before family, but family should also not come before church.
In the common man-made formula, family is always placed before church. But bear in mind, nowhere in the Bible is family described as “precious to God” as the church is. In fact, family relationships on earth, which are temporary, are only a picture of God’s greater reality, his relationship with us and ours with one another in Christ, which will last eternally. My relationship with my kids, as dear to me as they are, will only last a short time unless we are united together in the Body of Christ! I think I can say Biblically that the family is not placed before the church in the Bible. Therefore, I think we have to be careful not to do so as well. Obviously, we have greater responsibility for children when they are little, but that should not be an excuse to neglect church or work altogether. That's why I refer to the “Family First” movement as "worshipping the family" because those in it elevate the family higher than God does, making it an end in and of itself, instead of an instrument to bring us to the greater ends: loving God and loving other people. Grasping this will cause us to involve our families in ways to honor God and serve others and thereby, get us out into the world and to the church, not completely shielding them from the world and guarding them from too much time at church (though there needs to be an element of both protection and time management).
When my kids were little, we all did ministry together, and we still do often. I never felt that church got in the way of our family, and I don't think they felt that way either, though we spent far more time at church and serving, etc., than anyone I know. But it was never in the way of our family. I also don't know of any other family closer than ours, or young adult kids who love the church more than my kids do.
On the other hand, I knew many families who's kids are adults today, who's parents turned down ministry and were very guarded about church involvement because they would say, "Family First." Most of those kids are not even going to church today. Instead of "Family First," the Bible teaches that we should lead our families to put God first and others second. That will give us the most valuable family time we could have.
So the family was given us to help us in loving God and loving others. The family does not exist as an end in and of itself, but the greater end of honoring God and serving others. When we see the family that way, it gives it purpose, and it keeps God in first place and the rest of life in balance.
Thursday, December 9, 2010
What's Good About Winter?
Winter: it’s long, cold and dark. I know, we are still in the fun part with Christmas lights and all, but January is around the corner. The temptation is to just endure the season and long for April and May (though we had snow last April!).
But it doesn’t have to be that way. Thinking back, some of my most memorable times in life took place during the winter. Linda and I were engaged in the winter. I built our first house in the winter. Our youngest child was born in the winter. I first came into contact with the search committee of The Bridge (then Des Plaines Bible Church) in the winter.
Wouldn’t it be better to make the best of the season? Well, how?
A journalist recently hit the streets and asked people what they enjoyed most about the season. Here are some of the answers:
“Football playoffs and bowl games.”
“Reading by the fireplace on our living room couch.”
“Skiiing!”
“Shoveling snow.” (You might think that was a joke, but he was serious!)
“Putting on warm clothes.”
“Hot cocoa or apple cider.”
“Ice fishing.”
“I love the excitement of a blizzard or snow storm.”
“Going to the beach in South Florida.” (My favorite)
“Snow days off school!”
“Crisp, clean, fresh air and crunchy snow.”
“Museums––we never go when it’s warm out.”
“I don’t.” (HA!–he wouldn’t budge from his answer.)
If you thought about it long enough, you could come up with your own list. There are a lot of good things about winter, including many of the above for me. It’s all part of God’s beautiful plan for the change of seasons. The air is cleansed, the soil is reconditioned, and life is reset to get ready for the coming spring. So rather than enduring the season, make the best of it. Here are some suggestions:
1) Set some goals for this winter and build a task list of projects you want to get accomplished before the weather turns warm again.
2) Plan right now (and put on your calendar) some fun things to do that you wouldn’t normally enjoy in the summer. It might be driving to Wisconsin to do a little skiing, or maybe even to take snowboarding lessons (one of our fondest family memories when we did this together). How long has it been since you went to the Chicago museums? Rent skates and give ice skating a shot.
3) When it snows, get out there in it! Build a snow man or snow fort with the kids, or if you don’t have any, join the neighbor kids! Enjoy a good snow-ball fight with your spouse. If you can't beat the weather, join it! Sure you’ll get a little cold. But that makes coming inside and heating up the tea kettle all the more pleasurable.
4) Finally, winter can be a great time for rejuvenation. Find a couple of books you’ve been meaning to read and get started on them. Sleep more than you usually do. Try some writing; start a journal. Use the winter to defragment your hard drive, so to speak, and to gear up for coming spring.
If you do the above things, you might wind up saying that winter is your favorite time of the year!
Well….let’s not get carried away. ☺
But it doesn’t have to be that way. Thinking back, some of my most memorable times in life took place during the winter. Linda and I were engaged in the winter. I built our first house in the winter. Our youngest child was born in the winter. I first came into contact with the search committee of The Bridge (then Des Plaines Bible Church) in the winter.
Wouldn’t it be better to make the best of the season? Well, how?
A journalist recently hit the streets and asked people what they enjoyed most about the season. Here are some of the answers:
“Football playoffs and bowl games.”
“Reading by the fireplace on our living room couch.”
“Skiiing!”
“Shoveling snow.” (You might think that was a joke, but he was serious!)
“Putting on warm clothes.”
“Hot cocoa or apple cider.”
“Ice fishing.”
“I love the excitement of a blizzard or snow storm.”
“Going to the beach in South Florida.” (My favorite)
“Snow days off school!”
“Crisp, clean, fresh air and crunchy snow.”
“Museums––we never go when it’s warm out.”
“I don’t.” (HA!–he wouldn’t budge from his answer.)
If you thought about it long enough, you could come up with your own list. There are a lot of good things about winter, including many of the above for me. It’s all part of God’s beautiful plan for the change of seasons. The air is cleansed, the soil is reconditioned, and life is reset to get ready for the coming spring. So rather than enduring the season, make the best of it. Here are some suggestions:
1) Set some goals for this winter and build a task list of projects you want to get accomplished before the weather turns warm again.
2) Plan right now (and put on your calendar) some fun things to do that you wouldn’t normally enjoy in the summer. It might be driving to Wisconsin to do a little skiing, or maybe even to take snowboarding lessons (one of our fondest family memories when we did this together). How long has it been since you went to the Chicago museums? Rent skates and give ice skating a shot.
3) When it snows, get out there in it! Build a snow man or snow fort with the kids, or if you don’t have any, join the neighbor kids! Enjoy a good snow-ball fight with your spouse. If you can't beat the weather, join it! Sure you’ll get a little cold. But that makes coming inside and heating up the tea kettle all the more pleasurable.
4) Finally, winter can be a great time for rejuvenation. Find a couple of books you’ve been meaning to read and get started on them. Sleep more than you usually do. Try some writing; start a journal. Use the winter to defragment your hard drive, so to speak, and to gear up for coming spring.
If you do the above things, you might wind up saying that winter is your favorite time of the year!
Well….let’s not get carried away. ☺
Thursday, December 2, 2010
What Are You Doing for Christmas?
Here it is….Christmas season! Are you ready? Decorations up? Gift list completed? Shopping started? Plans for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day settled? Let’s talk about that.
While most everyone talks about Christ being left out of Christmas, I find that Christians are as guilty of that as anyone. While we say Christmas is about Jesus’ birth, we get our kids more excited about the myth of Santa than we do about the truth of Jesus (and in doing so causing a lot of later doubts–see my blog dated November 29, 2009). We cook a big meal, have extended family in, and then claim to not have enough time to honor Jesus’s birth and worship with our Christian family on Christmas Eve. We overextend ourselves with plastic credit, buying things that no one really needs for people who don’t really have needs, but give virtually nothing tangible to Him for His work at that time of the year. Yet, we still claim our celebration is all about Jesus. Is it really? Does He think it is?
So if we are going to keep Christ in Christmas, what is that going to look like?
First, find a way a to be Jesus to those who need Him. Look for creative ideas to be a blessing to some who are struggling. It might mean calling a couple of nursing homes to find a few people who rarely if ever have visitors. It might be volunteering for the Salvation Army or at the children’s hospital. We have a hats, mittens & scarves give-away for the homeless planned on the 17th. Join us! Maybe there are some at your workplace, neighborhood, or our church who have no family in the area and could be blessed by an invitation to join you and your family on Christmas Eve (for church as well as whatever else you have planned).
And I do hope you are making plans to worship on either Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. It’s hard for us to say that we are celebrating Christ’s birth when we are spending all this energy, time and resources on a celebration and can’t find the time (or perhaps unwilling to make it a priority) to gather with His family to worship and remember the meaning of his birth. We have two fantastic Christmas Eve services planned here at The Bridge (4 p.m. & 6 p.m.).
Here are a couple of other practical suggestions:
It is a wonderful time of the year! Enjoy it!
While most everyone talks about Christ being left out of Christmas, I find that Christians are as guilty of that as anyone. While we say Christmas is about Jesus’ birth, we get our kids more excited about the myth of Santa than we do about the truth of Jesus (and in doing so causing a lot of later doubts–see my blog dated November 29, 2009). We cook a big meal, have extended family in, and then claim to not have enough time to honor Jesus’s birth and worship with our Christian family on Christmas Eve. We overextend ourselves with plastic credit, buying things that no one really needs for people who don’t really have needs, but give virtually nothing tangible to Him for His work at that time of the year. Yet, we still claim our celebration is all about Jesus. Is it really? Does He think it is?
So if we are going to keep Christ in Christmas, what is that going to look like?
First, find a way a to be Jesus to those who need Him. Look for creative ideas to be a blessing to some who are struggling. It might mean calling a couple of nursing homes to find a few people who rarely if ever have visitors. It might be volunteering for the Salvation Army or at the children’s hospital. We have a hats, mittens & scarves give-away for the homeless planned on the 17th. Join us! Maybe there are some at your workplace, neighborhood, or our church who have no family in the area and could be blessed by an invitation to join you and your family on Christmas Eve (for church as well as whatever else you have planned).
And I do hope you are making plans to worship on either Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. It’s hard for us to say that we are celebrating Christ’s birth when we are spending all this energy, time and resources on a celebration and can’t find the time (or perhaps unwilling to make it a priority) to gather with His family to worship and remember the meaning of his birth. We have two fantastic Christmas Eve services planned here at The Bridge (4 p.m. & 6 p.m.).
Here are a couple of other practical suggestions:
- Sit down as a family and write out your Christmas season priorities
- Decorate early and together….make it fun!
- Talk about the meaning and value of gift-giving (establish some guidelines)
- Research and tell the real story of Saint Nicholas (much better than the make-believe)
- Find a Christmas program at an area church and attend it
- Schedule time in the evenings leading up to and on Christmas Day to read portions of the prophecies of the Messiah and the story of His birth.
It is a wonderful time of the year! Enjoy it!
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